6.45am
alarm went off. could not wake up, felt extremely tired.kept telling myself i need to get up. but....just 5 more mins....
7.20am
i'm ready and walked out of the house.oops...forgot my phone...luckily i was still waiting for the lift.
7.36am
thinking about tuesday's bible study...the last week, i've been led to Ephesians..but i haven't had a chance to touch on the book yet.thinking about my testimony, how i've become the person that i am today and my relationship with God. dwelling on the past...?? also felt the need to revisit James
8.02am
arrived in the office. felt instantly depressed.Lord, give me joy in my heart. i praise and am thankful that you have given me this job.i feel that maybe God is speaking to me, i need to open my heart and listen to what he is saying (just like Samuel). perhaps it is his way of letting me know that it's time for me to move on. or maybe that i need a complete change in career(!!). either way, i just pray that he will open (and close) doors and lead me to where he wants me to be.
8.25
ami just overheard something about tithes...i wasn't eavesdropping, the speaker was talking so loudly it echoed through the WHOLE office!and i felt sad, disappointed...angry...but i stopped myself. i have no right to judge, only God does... Ecc 3:17
8.26ama quick email JPoh letting her know that we NEED to have lunch today so I can update her ;)
8.47am
i'm drained...
9.35am
suddenly thought of the topic of prayer...will email the others, but somehow i feel that i need more time to prepare for this topic...
9.37am
sleep deprivation makes me emotionally unstable. but i've been getting enough sleeping hours!! yet i still feel like i haven't slept a wink at all...
10.14am
renewed sense of hope and purpose? Eph 6:5-8and then Eph 6:9...am wondering if i have time to do this well...Melvin sure sets a high standard!
10.16am
*.* stars in my eyes...am thinking about the things i told sw and fiona hohoho last night...
11.24am
needed a breather. will post this up now i think.
oh and Siping just sent an update! :)
Monday, November 26, 2007
Friday, November 23, 2007
Spiritual Warfare
Ok, this is a bit short and in a rush but I wanted to get this out before the afternoon!
Small group on Tuesday felt a bit strange as we were missing our brother Melvin, who is serving our Father in Cambodia. But he did call! So though his absence was dearly missed, we were all thinking of him and he, us! Siping filled us in a bit more about Mel’s ministry there and it led to a discussion of spiritual warfare. I believe that spiritual warfare is very real, in our daily lives, though we may not give much thought to it (though we should!!!) but it is especially when we’re taking a very conscious step to serve him in the field that it becomes very real. I’ve heard testimonies from friends and acquaintances who have and still are battling against the forces of Satan when they decided to switch to full-time ministry.
Spiritual warfare is not something that we should take lightly. It’s present in our everyday life. When you want to do something that you know is not right (and you’ve got like a little devil on one side telling you it’s ok and a little angel on the other side that’s telling you DON’T DO IT!!) or even in the strongholds of your thought patterns or opinions (like how little white lies are ok or “adult content movies”). And also, even in playing games or buying snacks from Bengawan Solo! Even when I’m feeling so tired and worn down from work that I decide to skip devotionals. Or when I’m getting ready to pray at night before I go to bed but just KO as soon as my head touches my pillow. Or the little struggles I face in my heart and mind about every thing one can possibly think up of. You know, when negative thoughts come into your mind…that kind…sometimes I wonder why I’m so weak to guard against these thoughts.
For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. Ephesians 6:12
These two verses means a lot to me. Not only to serve as a reminder and awareness but also the lesson/reason behind it…maybe I’ll share it with you one day ;)
For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh, for the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh, but divinely powerful for the destruction of fortresses. We are destroying speculations and every lofty thing raised up against the knowledge of God, and we are taking every thought captive in the obedience of Christ, and we are ready to punish all disobedience, whenever your obedience is complete. 2 Corinthians 10:3-6
And so…..i’ll close by saying “Not by might, nor by power, but by my spirit”, says the Lord. Zech 4:6
Melvin: Be encouraged because the Lord is with you :) and we’re all here, praying for you. Jia you!
Small group on Tuesday felt a bit strange as we were missing our brother Melvin, who is serving our Father in Cambodia. But he did call! So though his absence was dearly missed, we were all thinking of him and he, us! Siping filled us in a bit more about Mel’s ministry there and it led to a discussion of spiritual warfare. I believe that spiritual warfare is very real, in our daily lives, though we may not give much thought to it (though we should!!!) but it is especially when we’re taking a very conscious step to serve him in the field that it becomes very real. I’ve heard testimonies from friends and acquaintances who have and still are battling against the forces of Satan when they decided to switch to full-time ministry.
Spiritual warfare is not something that we should take lightly. It’s present in our everyday life. When you want to do something that you know is not right (and you’ve got like a little devil on one side telling you it’s ok and a little angel on the other side that’s telling you DON’T DO IT!!) or even in the strongholds of your thought patterns or opinions (like how little white lies are ok or “adult content movies”). And also, even in playing games or buying snacks from Bengawan Solo! Even when I’m feeling so tired and worn down from work that I decide to skip devotionals. Or when I’m getting ready to pray at night before I go to bed but just KO as soon as my head touches my pillow. Or the little struggles I face in my heart and mind about every thing one can possibly think up of. You know, when negative thoughts come into your mind…that kind…sometimes I wonder why I’m so weak to guard against these thoughts.
For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. Ephesians 6:12
These two verses means a lot to me. Not only to serve as a reminder and awareness but also the lesson/reason behind it…maybe I’ll share it with you one day ;)
For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh, for the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh, but divinely powerful for the destruction of fortresses. We are destroying speculations and every lofty thing raised up against the knowledge of God, and we are taking every thought captive in the obedience of Christ, and we are ready to punish all disobedience, whenever your obedience is complete. 2 Corinthians 10:3-6
And so…..i’ll close by saying “Not by might, nor by power, but by my spirit”, says the Lord. Zech 4:6
Melvin: Be encouraged because the Lord is with you :) and we’re all here, praying for you. Jia you!
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
a short word
hmm there's so many things i want to say, words to put down, thoughts to record.
you know, my memory is so bad these days! all part and parcel of getting old -.-
i've been thinking about getting baptised. somehow i feel that the time is right but i'm still praying for the Lord to show me the way. and i've been thinking about my testimony. i realise how far i've come and how much i've grown. how much i've struggled and how blessed i've been. how my life has changed...
i really want to blog more but i'm too tired. even though JPoh came to find me at 8pm and dragged me out of the office. i rented 2 movies on the way home - the Secret and Priceless.
you know, my memory is so bad these days! all part and parcel of getting old -.-
i've been thinking about getting baptised. somehow i feel that the time is right but i'm still praying for the Lord to show me the way. and i've been thinking about my testimony. i realise how far i've come and how much i've grown. how much i've struggled and how blessed i've been. how my life has changed...
i really want to blog more but i'm too tired. even though JPoh came to find me at 8pm and dragged me out of the office. i rented 2 movies on the way home - the Secret and Priceless.
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
emo post ahead...
had a quick chat to dear kathy who's having more fun than me on her exchange to Nottingham...
it's wonderful to hear that you've found someone who really likes you ;)
and of course someone to look out for you and take care of you!!! :p
like i told kat, its so nice to have someone when you're so far away from all thats familiar....
i'm so envious too...i just can't help thinking "when will it be my turn?"
i'm getting less and less excited about going home for Christmas.
it's just a natural reaction to be super enthusiastic when i talk about it.
even though it'll be less than 2 weeks away, there will be a few people i'll miss to death!
at least i plan to go from 16-29 dec but....my boss was really hesitant about me taking sooo many days off (it's not really that many if you think about it...).
i'll definitely miss the girls....and nicholas (can be considered one of the girls :p) and the rest of my second family - not so small :)
hmmm.....march is coming up really fast......another year older...
i feel like i haven't achieved much in the 9 months i've been here...
wow, almost a year...
"life is great when you have meaningful relationships" i guess that's true...
it's almost 11pm and i'm already starting to fall asleep......
i'll tell you a secret.....shhh.....i hate work....
i'm sick and i can't even take mc. and it's worse for me to be at work cos the a/c is so freakin' freezin'!!! now that it's wednesday, i'm really scared i'll be miserably sick the whole weekend too :( pray for quick recovery please! oh and then nicholas chan accused me of passing him my cold....like he would get sick that quickly?!! and hello?!! i didn't ask him to use my fork can!
i guess i know why i've been feeling so emo....
i've been spending alot of "alone" time in the last week...pretty much since my mum went home. and for those who REALLY know me, know that i hate being by myself. so then the emo thoughts come in and take over....lol
it's wonderful to hear that you've found someone who really likes you ;)
and of course someone to look out for you and take care of you!!! :p
like i told kat, its so nice to have someone when you're so far away from all thats familiar....
i'm so envious too...i just can't help thinking "when will it be my turn?"
i'm getting less and less excited about going home for Christmas.
it's just a natural reaction to be super enthusiastic when i talk about it.
even though it'll be less than 2 weeks away, there will be a few people i'll miss to death!
at least i plan to go from 16-29 dec but....my boss was really hesitant about me taking sooo many days off (it's not really that many if you think about it...).
i'll definitely miss the girls....and nicholas (can be considered one of the girls :p) and the rest of my second family - not so small :)
hmmm.....march is coming up really fast......another year older...
i feel like i haven't achieved much in the 9 months i've been here...
wow, almost a year...
"life is great when you have meaningful relationships" i guess that's true...
it's almost 11pm and i'm already starting to fall asleep......
i'll tell you a secret.....shhh.....i hate work....
i'm sick and i can't even take mc. and it's worse for me to be at work cos the a/c is so freakin' freezin'!!! now that it's wednesday, i'm really scared i'll be miserably sick the whole weekend too :( pray for quick recovery please! oh and then nicholas chan accused me of passing him my cold....like he would get sick that quickly?!! and hello?!! i didn't ask him to use my fork can!
i guess i know why i've been feeling so emo....
i've been spending alot of "alone" time in the last week...pretty much since my mum went home. and for those who REALLY know me, know that i hate being by myself. so then the emo thoughts come in and take over....lol
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
Saturday, November 10, 2007
thinking, wondering, hoping
i had the perfect opportunity. i was walking towards you and was just about to open my mouth to say "hi" when......
.........you looked up at me. and my heart stopped. i didn't even smile. i just turned and walked out the door purposefully. and then, i could have included you in our conversation. but i didn't.
WHY?????
i don't have the answer.
actually i do. i want it to be in God's perfect timing. i'm exercising patience. there will be many more chances in the future. definitely, for sure.
i find myself going down paths i've never taken. coming to crossroads after crossroads.
i just don't want to walk the road less travelled by myself.
i hate office politics. mummy gave me some good advice before she left.
we had some good long conversations whilst she was here and it has affirmed a few things i already knew.
on the last day she kept asking me if there was anything i wanted to tell her. i couldn't think of anything! then i asked her if my sister has a boyfriend. she said no, and offered an explanation too - she says my sister is "scary" LOL
and melissa IS scary! she's got high expectations and never compromises on values. this is kindda hard with the quality of guys out there....im serious!
then i asked my mum why she didn't ask if i had a boyfriend.
she laughed -_- then asked, "do you?"
obviously you all know the answer: no.
then i told her about how anxious i was about getting older and being alone, she laughed then told me to be patient and prayerful.
oh and she also complained about how little sleep i'm getting. it can't be helped!!! night time is the only time i get all to myself. and then i need to get up early so i can be at work before 8am.
i'm so not getting my beauty sleep!
hmm and work is another matter entirely. too late to go into that now. it's almost 11pm...
goodnight!
.........you looked up at me. and my heart stopped. i didn't even smile. i just turned and walked out the door purposefully. and then, i could have included you in our conversation. but i didn't.
WHY?????
i don't have the answer.
actually i do. i want it to be in God's perfect timing. i'm exercising patience. there will be many more chances in the future. definitely, for sure.
i find myself going down paths i've never taken. coming to crossroads after crossroads.
i just don't want to walk the road less travelled by myself.
i hate office politics. mummy gave me some good advice before she left.
we had some good long conversations whilst she was here and it has affirmed a few things i already knew.
on the last day she kept asking me if there was anything i wanted to tell her. i couldn't think of anything! then i asked her if my sister has a boyfriend. she said no, and offered an explanation too - she says my sister is "scary" LOL
and melissa IS scary! she's got high expectations and never compromises on values. this is kindda hard with the quality of guys out there....im serious!
then i asked my mum why she didn't ask if i had a boyfriend.
she laughed -_- then asked, "do you?"
obviously you all know the answer: no.
then i told her about how anxious i was about getting older and being alone, she laughed then told me to be patient and prayerful.
oh and she also complained about how little sleep i'm getting. it can't be helped!!! night time is the only time i get all to myself. and then i need to get up early so i can be at work before 8am.
i'm so not getting my beauty sleep!
hmm and work is another matter entirely. too late to go into that now. it's almost 11pm...
goodnight!
Friday, November 09, 2007
March 9
this is the extent of my boredom...
(thanks goes out to melvin who put the idea into my head)
according to Wikipedia:
March 9 is the 68th day of the year (69th in leap years) in the Gregorian calendar. There are 297 days remaining until the end of the year.
several events and births...none worthy enough to catch my attention
uneventful :(
(thanks goes out to melvin who put the idea into my head)
according to Wikipedia:
March 9 is the 68th day of the year (69th in leap years) in the Gregorian calendar. There are 297 days remaining until the end of the year.
several events and births...none worthy enough to catch my attention
uneventful :(
from Michelle's desk
i have no facebook or friendster access so Qi has been so kind as to suggest that i blog instead.
hmm, but i think it's easier to multi-task when i'm talking to her on the phone! LOL
i'm totally confused now!
someone i've been avoiding....just when i thought "i'm a big girl, i can handle it" i've been warned to keep staying away.
sigh....
oh! today i opened a whole stack of bills and guess what?!!
they're all ZERO balance!!! YAY!!! only have my singtel bill to pay for BUT it's amazingly less than $100! WOW!
i'm learning to save, my "savings" account is depleting far more quickly than i anticipated :(
tonight is Group Risk D&D so we're allowed to leave early - 4pm!
unfortunately, i'm also doing revaluation tonight, which can only be started at 7pm!!!
but JPoh and i have devised a plan - leave at 4 to shop/coffee/chat and come back at 6plus :)
i just received word that jason and the guys have already left to go to the rec club for a pool session -_-
i'm so tired ~~
hmm, but i think it's easier to multi-task when i'm talking to her on the phone! LOL
i'm totally confused now!
someone i've been avoiding....just when i thought "i'm a big girl, i can handle it" i've been warned to keep staying away.
sigh....
oh! today i opened a whole stack of bills and guess what?!!
they're all ZERO balance!!! YAY!!! only have my singtel bill to pay for BUT it's amazingly less than $100! WOW!
i'm learning to save, my "savings" account is depleting far more quickly than i anticipated :(
tonight is Group Risk D&D so we're allowed to leave early - 4pm!
unfortunately, i'm also doing revaluation tonight, which can only be started at 7pm!!!
but JPoh and i have devised a plan - leave at 4 to shop/coffee/chat and come back at 6plus :)
i just received word that jason and the guys have already left to go to the rec club for a pool session -_-
i'm so tired ~~
Thursday, November 08, 2007
Museum Outing
visitied the National Museum today! free entry....but not really that much to see, although the company was excellent as usual ;) met up with Fiona, Qi, Nicholas and Melvin for brunch at Soup Spoon (the food wasn't fantastic), then headed to the Museum, followed by dessert at ProjectShop Paragon, more food at Thai Express, then hairdressers, shopping and dinner with dear Sinyee! hmm...spent 12 hours out today...really tired now but i blogged these photos for miss teo yan qi!!! love ya heaps gal ;) HUGS TO ALL MY WONDERFUL FRIENDS I MET UP WITH TODAY :) i'm glad to have you all to share my life with!
something wrong with qi's camera?
deepavali
inside the museum
going up...
mmm....singapore food history!
checking out the displays
at Thai Express
Wednesday, November 07, 2007
in my head
my thoughts are all jumbled at the moment. i feel all empty inside.
totally drained mentally, emotionally...can i handle everything??
JPoh asks the most interesting questions. sometimes i think she can really see deep into my heart and tries to make me realise/say out loud how i really feel.
i must say i was really disappointed, above all.
it's a horrible feeling, when you realise that you don't mean much at all to someone who means so much to you.
and i've got conscience warfare going on about someone....
something i shouldn't touch, something i shouldn't even be contemplating about!
these words....they're all just words....i'm trying not to read too much into them....
totally drained mentally, emotionally...can i handle everything??
JPoh asks the most interesting questions. sometimes i think she can really see deep into my heart and tries to make me realise/say out loud how i really feel.
i must say i was really disappointed, above all.
it's a horrible feeling, when you realise that you don't mean much at all to someone who means so much to you.
and i've got conscience warfare going on about someone....
something i shouldn't touch, something i shouldn't even be contemplating about!
these words....they're all just words....i'm trying not to read too much into them....
true sad story
they have blocked facebook and friendster at work.
the night before that, i was telling melvin and nicholas how addicted i'm becoming to facebook.
that will teach me....
the night before that, i was telling melvin and nicholas how addicted i'm becoming to facebook.
that will teach me....
Thursday, November 01, 2007
interesting convos...
workload was quite light today (but i do have a growing pile of back logs to do -_-).
i was finally convinced to finish up at about 9pm.
had to pop by home during lunch so Andrew and I decided to have chicken rice at my place.
had an interesting conversation about what I'm looking for in a partner.
called up ah teo in the evening for a chat.
she told me something very interesting ;)
babe, i really do enjoy our phone time at work!!
had drinks with the "cosy 4" tonight.
there are always several interesting discussions we have!
the laughs...the company...the stupidest things we say/do...
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