thinking, wondering, hoping

i had the perfect opportunity. i was walking towards you and was just about to open my mouth to say "hi" when......

.........you looked up at me. and my heart stopped. i didn't even smile. i just turned and walked out the door purposefully. and then, i could have included you in our conversation. but i didn't.

WHY?????
i don't have the answer.
actually i do. i want it to be in God's perfect timing. i'm exercising patience. there will be many more chances in the future. definitely, for sure.

i find myself going down paths i've never taken. coming to crossroads after crossroads.
i just don't want to walk the road less travelled by myself.

i hate office politics. mummy gave me some good advice before she left.
we had some good long conversations whilst she was here and it has affirmed a few things i already knew.
on the last day she kept asking me if there was anything i wanted to tell her. i couldn't think of anything! then i asked her if my sister has a boyfriend. she said no, and offered an explanation too - she says my sister is "scary" LOL
and melissa IS scary! she's got high expectations and never compromises on values. this is kindda hard with the quality of guys out there....im serious!
then i asked my mum why she didn't ask if i had a boyfriend.
she laughed -_- then asked, "do you?"
obviously you all know the answer: no.
then i told her about how anxious i was about getting older and being alone, she laughed then told me to be patient and prayerful.
oh and she also complained about how little sleep i'm getting. it can't be helped!!! night time is the only time i get all to myself. and then i need to get up early so i can be at work before 8am.
i'm so not getting my beauty sleep!

hmm and work is another matter entirely. too late to go into that now. it's almost 11pm...

goodnight!