try not to procrastinate

but here i am... when i should be studying. i haven't reached the panic stage yet. right now, i'm still quite calm about what i already know (though there's a lot more that i don't).

jealousy is raging inside me, i try to put it aside but it still rears its ugly head at the worst of times. i don't even know why i should be jealous, there is absolutely no reason for me to be!

i've been getting nagged at, though i think mel is secretly glad that she gets a break. and this morning, a looooonnnnng lecture. i admit, i tuned out. it's always the same anyway.

so i'm trying not to think about how i never seem to measure up and how much better others are than me.

i can't believe that now that i'm actually here, all i can think about is finding a job.... in singapore!
and it's definitely not because of wrong reasons. strangely, when there is nothing holding me back in singapore anymore, it is still where i want to be. but i do miss melbourne..... hehe