thank God... really??

there are infinite things to be thankful for, definitely thank God for the good and the bad, because... "Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope." - Romans 5: 3-4.

today A wrote this (in jest, of course, 'cos we always do this kinda wu liao things) after i sent out one of my daily reports:

"I thank God for Mich for which without her, the reports would not be generated, carefully scrutinized and sent out in an orderly and timely manner.

Where is God when I needed a few more distinctions ?!?!?!?!? – Opps, just kidding, God"

which in turn, reminded me of the time someone also said to me that they are thankful for me. and isn't it just scarily coincidental that the song All My Life was playing.

And all my life
I've prayed for someone like you
And I thank God that I, that I finally found you
All my life
I've prayed for someone like you
And I hope that you feel the same way too
Yes, I pray that you do love me too

just to digress a bit as well, i'm reminded of a scene from a movie, just can't remember which movie it is from... where the female lead is sitting in front of the tv, watching some old-school movie where the male lead in that movie was professing his love for his leading lady and that he will always love her, forever and ever etc etc... and the female lead watching the movie suddenly yells out "LIAR!!!" and throws whatever she had been eating at the tv.

and talking about jaded lovers... i still remember, i think it was like, the second or third day of my working at the bank, and jason was asking me what "jaded" meant cos his "perfect girl" had described herself as being jaded.

is there something, some sort of neon sign hanging above my head, inviting guys i barely know to pour out their sob-story about their love lives???!!! it happened soon after i met jason and happened again soon after i met big bird...

OH! i remember the movie now!!!!!! it was in Legally Blonde and Reese Witherspoon had just been dumped by her "perfect" boyfriend for another girl. she was wallowing in chocolates and had been watching some day-time soap opera, and had thrown the whole box of chocolates at the tv!

back to the topic, so really, don't thank God for me... i should thank him for using me to touch your life instead, and to pray that he will continue to use me to touch other's lives.

read a really confusing devotion today. i didn't quite understand it, perhaps need someone to clarify things? but a part of this devotion did speak to me, even though it was in a way unrelated to the devotion topic.

"As I mature, I’m seeing some of that messiness as God’s way of growing me up. It forces me to choose between offense or grace, between bitterness or forgiveness and between selfishness or service."

i'm reflecting on my imperfect self... sigh... Father, please give me the wisdom to choose wisely, to grow and to encourage others. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.